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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

ONE LINERS- Hidden meanings in Company Talk (humor)

Today's Traditional Management FUNDAS....

1."We will do it" means "You will do it"

2."You have done a great job" means "More work will be given to you"

3."We are working on it" means "We have not started working on the same"

4."Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means "It's not getting done at least not tomorrow"

5."After discussion we will decide. I am very open to views" means "I have already decided. I will tell you what to do"

6."There was a slight miscommunication" means "We had actually lied"

7."Let's call a meeting and discuss" means "I have no time now, we'll talk later"

8."We can always do it" means "We actually cannot do the same on time"

9."We are on the right track but there's need to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time"

10."We had slight differences on opinion" means "We had actually fought"

11."Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means "Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"

12."You should have told me earlier" means "Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference."

13."We need to find out the real reason" means "Well I will tell you where your fault is"

14."Well, FAMILY is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected." means "Well you know...."

15."We are a team" means "I am not the only one to be blamed"

16."That's actually a good question" means "I do not know anything about it"

17."All the best" means "You are in trouble"

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